When the iPhone was announced, I bowed my head and thanked Father Jobs for finally merging all of the things I do into one device; a device that would surely be the perfect piece of technology. I told my friends that I didn't care how much it might cost...I'd be getting one the moment it was unleashed onto the world. Best of all, I had a new false Apple Thing to worship and count down the days to. I was sated.
Meanwhile, during the 5 months it actually took to build up sufficient hype for the new Immaculate Apple iPhone Child, I sort of became addicted to the BlackBerry. As the coming of the iPhone approached, I started to wonder what the iPhone would REALLY have over my Blackberry Curve (other than a way better name). After all, I have an 80gb iPod loaded with movies, tv shows and music, so why did I REALLY need an iPhone. My BlackBerry also plays music and movies, has a memory slot allowing up to an 8gb MicroSD card, and works flawlessly with my emails and text messages. I type emails and text quite a lot, so a reliable keyboard is important to me. Plus, the more I thought about it, the less I saw a need for touch screen scrolling or picture widening and shrinking. It seems neat, but sort of gadgety for the sake of being gadgety.
So I passed on the iPhone. I decided that my BlackBerry works perfectly for what I use it for, and that there is no real need to leap into the unknown fancy world of the overpriced and over-hyped Phoney Grail. Function over form for once, I deciced. My fellow MAC Disciples shunned me. They told tales of a golden perfect wonder phone with magical healing abilities and future powder. "You'll regret it!" they chortled. The flash of their Intel-based Macbook Pros made me feel like a G4 Powerbook, slumming loser. I questioned my decision to stay with RIM (BB) over Apple, but their single-buttoned smugness strengthened my resolve.
And then it occured to me. I finally know how the PC crowd feels like every time they are forced to listen to some holier than thou Macaholic like me. It seems we are ranting douche-bags most of the time, and we say stuff like:
"Okay! Stick with your HP. Good luck AUTOMATING."
"I get it. You're too dumb to get that Apple is better."
"Let's just put it this way: PC's are retarded and you hate simple, yet proprietary!"
"Apple INVENTED awesome."
I feel like a shell, an easy to dent (and thus the warranty is void), softer-than-normal aluminum shell, has been lifted from around my head. First of all, who cares enough to argue about which OPERATING SYSTEM is better. I curse myself for ever uttering anything to do with a computer argument.
So, to all you PC users out there, I apologize for being one of "those Mac assholes" for so long. Don't get me wrong, I'll probably stick with Mac, and I can't say I'll rule out ever buying an iPhone, but for now I like to:
-Have a removable battery.
-Use Mp3s as ringtones.
-Cut and Paste.
-Type on an actual keyboard with plastic buttons.
-Not have to rely on Applecare if something goes wrong with the phone.
-Not have to be the dude opening and closing my hand on a touchscreen in the Starbucks.
-Add games or third party software to my smartphone.
You know, simple things that I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO DO WITH AN iPHONE.
But, I get it. It's a neat toy. I suppose it's just odd to be on the other side of the standard arrogant Mac douchebaggery, instead of being the dickhole who's been dishing it out to PC folk for so long.
Posted at 04:11 AM | Permalink | Comments (13)
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